Can Hypnosis Help Me Get Over My Ex/Addiction/Regret? The answer is yes, but the type of hypnotherapy you choose matters

Do you have a nagging problem that you just can't seem to get over and hope that hypnosis can help you get past it? Maybe you have a habit you want to break. Maybe you are having trouble recovering from a break-up, or a professional set-back. Or you did something you regret and can't seem to get over it, no matter how hard you try. Many people who reach out to me are in this situation.

It's natural to want to finally be done with a problem, to hypnotize it away. Suggestion hypnosis was designed to be that magic pill. And, yes, sometimes suggestion hypnosis works wonders on these types of situations. There are plenty of skilled hypnotherapists who will offer suggestion hypnosis as a stand alone service. I am not one of them, and I'll tell you why.

For me, there is an ethical problem with suggestion hypnosis as a stand-alone cure; and, it is not often that I will take on a client who is expecting this type of quick fix. When you have a problem like the ones mentioned above, there is almost always something deeper at the root of the problem that will not be resolved when you hypnotize away the presenting problem. Having difficulty getting over a break up, for example, could be pointing to feelings of unworthiness, fear of abandonment, or it could be a symptom of past or current emotional abuse or trauma. If you don't work through and heal those underlying problems, what will happen when you enter into another relationship? You will very likely find yourself having similar relationship problems which will lead to yet another break-up that you can't seem to get over.

Or, maybe you are hoping some suggestion hypnosis will help you to end a drinking habit. Sure, it might help you stop drinking for now, but what will happen when you encounter the emotional triggers that you were avoiding by drinking? Even if you don't start drinking again when you encounter those triggers, you will likely develop another avoidance habit because you still haven't resolved the root cause of the habit.

In my years of experience as a Certified Hypnotherapist and Depth Hypnosis Practitioner, I have learned to reserve suggestion hypnosis to be used only as a supplement to deeper, ongoing work to heal and resolve problems at their root.

Depth Hypnosis will require more from you as a client than suggestion hypnosis would. The work is deep, and can take anywhere from weeks to months. When considering the amount of time it will take to work through your presenting problems, I encourage you to consider how much time, energy, and money your problems are costing you. Consider investing that time, energy, and money in healing, instead.

In Depth Hypnosis sessions, you will be held in a safe and supportive container while you uncover and heal those things that have been haunting you and causing your suffering. With the gentle guidance and care of an experienced Depth Hypnosis Practitioner, you will be able to heal your problems at their root, so that not only will you change your relationship to your presenting problems, but you will also be stronger and better equipped when you encounter situations that would have once triggered you.

If you turned to hypnosis in the hopes of finally healing a problem that's been following you around, why not invest a little more time to have much deeper and longer lasting relief? It truly is possible to heal, and there is a Depth Hypnosis Practitioner waiting to guide you through that process. Book a free consultation with me to see if Depth Hypnosis would be a good fit for you, or find one of many other skilled practitioners on the Association of Depth Hypnosis Practitioners website.

Sleep Like A Husband: A Mom's Guide to Self-Hypnosis for Quality Sleep

Sleep is the number one thing people ask me about when I tell them I’m a hypnotherapist. This guide is written with sleep-deprived mothers (and fathers) in mind, but it can help anyone who is struggling with falling and staying asleep.

I always knew that the first few months after having a baby would be difficult. I knew I’d spend many sleepless nights with a crying infant. What I didn’t know was how dramatically my sleep habits would shift. As a breastfeeding mother, I had to awaken every two to three hours for the first eight months of my daughter’s life. In those early days, I would look forward to the days when she would start to sleep through the night. I promised myself that it would happen soon and that sweet sleep was waiting for me, just around the bend. And then, one miraculous night, she finally slept though. I woke up at 5:00 AM in a panic, convinced something horrible had happened, only to find her peacefully snoring. This happened again the next night, and again for several nights after that. I was thrilled that she was finally sleeping, but was horrified to find that while she slept, I continued to wake every 2-3 hours throughout the night. My sleep rhythms were broken.

I asked around and discovered this sad tale was one that many other new mothers were also experiencing. It seems that as mothers, we not only become conditioned to wake up during the night, but we also wake up fully. When I would wake in the night, I would immediately have a hormonal wave go through me like a rally cry, banging at my mind, yelling “WAKE UP, THE BABY NEEDS YOU! CHECK THAT SHE’S STILL BREATHING!” After checking that the baby was breathing, I should have gone right back to sleep, but I’d be wide awake with a renewed expectation that surely the baby would cry soon and I’d have to get up all over again. And so, the pattern of not sleeping persisted.

Luckily, I had the presence of mind to try applying hypnosis to my predicament. I decided I would try a bit of self-hypnosis and see if I could shift out of my night-waking patterns. And…it worked! Full disclosure: it only lasted for about a week and then my daughter got sick and I had to start all over again. So, through my experimentation, I discovered that self-hypnosis works for changing sleep patterns, but it does require more than one session and some maintenance to bring continued relief.

Here’s how it’s done. As you’re lying down to sleep for the night, take a moment to relax your body, checking in with your head, your face, your shoulders, arms, hands, back, legs feet and toes. Release any tension you feel in any of those places. Then shift your focus to your breath. Follow your breath as your breathe in and as you breathe out. When you’re feeling sufficiently relaxed, start saying affirmations surrounding the changes you want to implement around sleep. Speak these affirmations in your mind, slowly and lullingly like they are a boat drifting on a sea. You don’t have to have a planned script, you can just say things as they come to you and repeat them as often as you like:

I am relaxed and ready to sleep. Sleep is going to come quite easily for me tonight. I will find myself relaxing more and more every night and falling asleep easier and easier. As time goes on, sleep will come more and more naturally to me. I will find that it becomes easier to relax and let go of my thoughts. I will relax more and more deeply. The more I relax, the more easy it will become to rest and sleep. I will know that my baby will be okay while I’m sleeping. I know that even though I will be sleeping very deeply, I will find it easy to wake up if he/she needs me. If I wake up, I will also find that it’s quite easy to return to a deep sleep and I will be able to sleep even deeper than before. I will continue to sleep very deeply and soundly for the rest of the night. Every time I wake up, I will remember that I can return to a deep sleep and will relax. The more I relax, the easier it will be to sleep. I will save all worries for tomorrow, and will find peace in my sleep…

You can continue on with other affirmations that you would like to implement. As in the above example, always keep them phrased as positive affirmations (avoid words like “not, no, won’t”). I would recommend that you practice this every night when you first go to bed. Continue on with it until you actually fall asleep. If you notice other thoughts arising, let them drift by and gently return to your boat on the sea of sleep affirmations. If you wake in the night, repeat the process until you are asleep again. In time, you will likely find that you don’t need to practice as often because sleep will begin to happen more naturally. I would also highly recommend that you try recording yourself and listen to the recording when drifting off, or even at other times in the day for added support. If you try this practice, let me know how it worked for you in the comments.

If you would like additional support with falling and staying asleep, or have some other problem you’d like to work on, I encourage you to reach out to a Depth Hypnosis practitioner or book an appointment with me.

A Mantra For Overwhelm and Stress

We’ve all been there: Your alarm didn’t go off, so you had to rush. You spilled coffee on your shirt because you were rushing. You got to your car to discover it was out of gas, so you had to stop, making you even more late for work. And the day just got worse from there.

Even the most calm and centered beings can experience times of overwhelm and stress. A common reaction to stress is negative thinking. This negative thinking often spirals until there’s a sense of overwhelm, panic, or doom. My clients have been reporting success in managing their stress with a mantra I’ve given them, so I thought I would offer it here so my readers can try it, too.

The mantra is called It’s Okay. The focus of the mantra is acceptance and perspective. Often when we are feeling overwhelmed or anxious, we are throwing our energy into a sense of doom, or that everything is definitely not okay. In reality, the universe is very big, and we are very small and insignificant. Does it really matter if you’re late to work today? Are you going to remember this moment a week from now, a month from now, a year? Probably not. Your shirt is ruined from the coffee spill. Are you lucky enough to have others? The goal of this mantra is to retrain your thoughts to accept the situation and then introduce an alternate, more positive perspective. In saying the mantra, you are giving everything in the universe permission to be exactly as it is. This mantra can be used at anytime, even in a meeting. Just take deep breaths and say the mantra in your mind.

Here’s how it works: When you notice you are feeling stressed, overwhelmed, or anxious, you start to break down the thoughts that are contributing to this overwhelm, and then responding to them with, “It’s Okay.” With each “It’s Okay,” take a big breath in and then imagine you are releasing the stress as you breathe out. Here’s what that would look like using the example above:

Inhale, Exhale: “It’s okay that my alarm didn’t go off- I’ll be late today, but that doesn’t mean I’ll be late tomorrow.

Inhale, Exhale: It’s okay that I’m running late, sometimes life requires a different pace.

Inhale, Exhale: It’s okay that I’m feeling rushed, I’m allowed to feel that way sometimes.

Inhale, Exhale: It’s okay that I might get to work late, tomorrow I will do better.

Inhale, Exhale: It’s okay that I spilled my coffee.

It’s okay that I have to change my shirt.

It’s okay that I don’t like this shirt as much as the other one, it is only a shirt, I am lucky to have others.

It’s okay that I’ll be running late, we all run late sometimes.

It’s okay that my boss doesn’t like when I’m late, she is allowed to feel that way.

It’s okay that that I’m angry with myself for failing to get to work on time.

It’s okay that I’m feeling stressed.

It’s okay that the car is low on gas and I have to stop…

You get the idea. Ultimately, most of the stress, anxiety, and overwhelm we experience is a result of very temporary situations. These things are all going to pass. Everything that is happening is okay. You will get through this time, and then you will even forget about it. It’s okay to let it go.

If you would like additional support with anxiety or stress management, or have some other problem you’d like to work on, I encourage you to reach out to a Depth Hypnosis practitioner or book an appointment with me.